Thursday, June 24, 2010

Second Orioles Game of the Season

Orioles 11  Florida 5

Natalie had free tickets for the Orioles game tonight that she got from her company's attorney. The whole family went. They were some of the best seats we've ever had and the parking pass, Lot "A", is right next to the stadium. And, prepare yourself, we won. Tejada, in particular, was great but even Craig Tatum went 3 for 5. Lots of fun.


I came close to catching a foul ball, closer than I've ever been before. The ball went straight up so it was a toss up of  not having it land on my head or catching it. At the last second I reached over with my left hand and almost caught it. I think I touched it but the guy in the seat right behind me caught it with both hands and screamed in my face "I got it!" Douchebag. Natalie also had a run in with a foul ball. She was coming through the tunnel from the concourse when a ball landed at the entrance. She should have dove for it.

I was shocked by two things at the game. The sound guy played a Stranglers song (Golden Brown) and some moron stole the "O" magnet off my car. That was the second one that was stolen - the first one was stolen while the car was parked on Harford Rd. during the Hamilton festival. No surprise there - Hamilton has always been full of dirtbags.


From the Baltimore Sun
Photos by Gene Sweeney Jr.










O's offense breaks out in 11-5 win over Marlins


Tejada drives in 4 runs, team has 17 hits to back Millwood


When Orioles right-hander Kevin Millwood threw quality start after quality start earlier this season, only to get handed no-decisions and losses because of a lackluster offense, he didn't complain, didn't point fingers.

On Thursday, it was payback time for Millwood, who survived five shaky innings in an 11-5 Orioles win that ended an 11-game losing streak to the Florida Marlins.

An offense that had scored just 33 runs in Millwood's first 12 starts has scored 27 for him in his past four outings, the past two of which have resulted in Millwood's only victories of the season.

"It was terrible because early in the year he was giving up two and three runs and getting the loss every time," said reserve catcher Craig Tatum, who had a career-high three hits, including two doubles. "So for us to play the way we did and finally get him his second win, well, he deserves it for how he has pitched for us."

The Orioles (20-52) avoided a sweep by the Marlins (35-37) while picking up their 20th win -- a distinction the 2009 Orioles, who lost 98 games, achieved May 26, almost a month earlier than this year's club.

Playing before an announced 15,397, the much-maligned offense tied a season high for hits with 17, scored in double digits for only the second time this year and had six hits in one inning for the second consecutive night.

Third baseman Miguel Tejada led the way with four hits, including a backbreaking three-run homer in the eighth that ended a career-long homerless drought of 205 at-bats. Tejada had four RBIs on Thursday after driving in four runs in his past 30 games.

"It feels great just because I think tonight was a night that we're all waiting for," said Tejada, who had last homered against Boston's Daniel Bard on April 30. "We just haven't been hitting the way we are supposed to be hitting, but tonight we all contributed."

Center fielder Adam Jones also did his part with three hits and two RBIs, including his 11th homer of season, a solo shot in the sixth against Alejandro Sanabia, who was making his major league debut.

The homer, which came on Jones' mini-bobblehead giveaway night, was the anti-called shot.

"The first pitch, I was asking the [fans] right next to the dugout behind the on-deck circle, 'You want me to swing or bunt?' They said, 'Bunt,' so I tried to bunt," Jones said. "Good thing I fouled it off because the next pitch, I hit it out."

It was that kind of offensive night for the Orioles, who were down 3-0 in the third when they sent 10 men to the plate and scored five runs against Florida starter Nate Robertson (5-6), who had shut down the Tampa Bay Rays in his previous outing.

"We beat the best team in the division five days ago, and then the team that's in last place in the division kicks your tail," said Robertson, who allowed five runs in 21/3 innings. "It's a funny game. That's why I don't like when people say, 'Oh, they're terrible,' or, 'They're a bad team.' They're just inconsistent, because everybody up here is good. They grinded out a win."

The Orioles' offense had to rally because Millwood put them into a 3-0 hole through the first two innings. He yielded two runs in the first and has allowed 20 first-inning runs in his past seven starts after giving up none in the opening inning in his first nine starts.

He threw 116 pitches, just 52 percent of them for strikes, his worst strike percentage of the season. It was his shortest outing since a five-inning stint on Opening Day,

"The big deal was not locating," said Millwood (2-8), who allowed four runs on eight hits and two walks. "It's become a problem my last four or five [starts]. It's something that I've got to figure out and get fixed so I can go more than five or six innings."

Still, he had a two-run lead in the fifth and nearly handed it back. He walked the first two batters and gave up a one-out RBI single to Dan Uggla.

But with two outs and two on, Millwood threw his 116th and final pitch of the night -- a 93 mph fastball -- past 20-year-old Marlins phenom Mike Stanton for the third out.

"I was going to try to stick with him as long as I could to try to get him the win. But if he walked Stanton, I would have had to get him," interim manager Juan Samuel said.

The bullpen took over from there. Jason Berken threw two scoreless innings with three strikeouts, David Hernandez threw a perfect inning with two strikeouts and Matt Albers finished by allowing one run on two hits in the ninth.



Dan Connoly



Tuesday, June 22, 2010

First Orioles Game Of The Season


Florida 10 Orioles 4



Predictable. A gang of us went to the game, including Mom in her wheelchair. It was Ty Wigginton tee-shirt night and it was hot, incredibly hot. After the game, the Marlins fired their manager, bench coach, and hitting coach. And they won.




From the Baltimore Sun
Photos by Gene Sweeney Jr.










Marlins floor Guthrie, O's, 10-4

Starter allows 6 runs, tying season high; Florida closes door vs. bullpen

All the excitement the Orioles generated in their first game back home lasted about as long as Matt Wieters' seemingly harmless fly ball in the second inning hung in the air before carrying into the left-field seats.

Aside from Wieters' three-run home run off Anibal Sanchez, the Orioles did very little right in their 10-4 loss to the Florida Marlins on Tuesday night before an announced 14,821 at sleepy Camden Yards.

Jeremy Guthrie had one of his worst starts of the season, putting his team into a four-run hole in the second inning and allowing six earned runs in the game. The bullpen made sure the Orioles had no chance to come back by surrendering three runs in the ninth inning with Matt Albers failing to retire any of the three hitters he faced.


The defense was again spotty, with second baseman Scott Moore failing to make a key play in the Marlins' four-run second inning and committing a run-scoring throwing error in the eighth.

And the offense managed a respectable 10 hits but went into a slumber in the middle innings against Sanchez when the outcome was still in doubt.

Throw all those elements together and you had a typical performance by these lowly Orioles, who fell to 19-51 after dropping the first contest of a nine-game homestand. They have lost nine of their past 10 games with the Marlins and are 5-17 against them all time.

Overall, the Orioles have dropped 20 of their past 24 games and eight of their past 10 in a season that grows uglier by the day.

"Not a very good showing there the first couple of innings," said Juan Samuel, who fell to 4-12 as the Orioles' interim manager. "For some reason, Guthrie didn't look right, missing his spots. But he settled down after that. We just couldn't hold them. He just did not look good there the first couple of innings. I started to worry a little bit, but then he kind of settled down there and gave us some good innings."

All-Star shortstop Hanley Ramirez landed the big hit in the Marlins' four-run second with a two-run double. He finished 3-for-4 with three RBIs and is 9-for-17 (.529) with 14 RBIs in five games against the Orioles over the past two seasons.

Guthrie, who has lost five straight decisions to fall to 3-9, surrendered a season-high-tying six earned runs on seven hits and two walks over six-plus innings. He also drew the ire of both the Marlins and plate umpire Doug Eddings after he hit Jorge Cantu in the left side with the first pitch after Ramirez's double down the right-field line gave the Marlins a 4-0 advantage in the second.

There was no further incident, and Guthrie said he was not surprised by Eddings' warning.

"The situation probably looks bad," Guthrie said. "They get a few runs like that, and the ball gets away inside. It's not surprising. It doesn't affect the way I approach the game. I am still going to throw inside. It is still a part of my game. It wasn't a big deal."

After Cantu was hit, Guthrie retired 13 of the next 14 hitters he faced before he was chased by Gaby Sanchez's RBI double with no outs in the seventh that made the score 5-3. Ramirez followed with a run-scoring single off Jason Berken to finish Guthrie's line.

"I thought the location was better later in the game," Guthrie said.

"I made terrible pitches with the slider, especially in the inning that hurt me. I didn't really make great ones with it later on, so I just pretty much tried to quit throwing it. Pitch execution was definitely the biggest difference between the second and the other innings."

While Guthrie settled down in the middle innings, so did Anibal Sanchez, who was never in much trouble after the second. In that inning, Ty Wigginton hit a leadoff double (on his T-shirt givewaway night) and Adam Jones singled, putting runners on first and third with one out.

Wieters then jumped on Sanchez's first pitch and sent a high fly ball to left-center field. It figured to at least score a run on a sacrifice fly, but Chris Coghlan kept drifting back to the wall before his leaping attempt came up short.

It was Wieters' sixth homer of the season and his second consecutive three-RBI game. It was also the Orioles' first homer of three runs or more since Luke Scott's grand slam off Seattle Mariners reliever Brandon League on May 13. It was just their fourth homer of three runs or more all season.

"First and third, I was just trying to hit a fly ball," Wieters said. "The ball was carrying a good way tonight, so I thought I had a chance. [That] it carries out is a good feeling. I think that's going back to not trying to do too much, not trying to hit home runs. It's the double and home runs that carry, so just try to hit the ball to the gap and get the ball to carry."

Jake Fox, whom the Orioles acquired from the Oakland Athletics earlier in the day, did the same when he was called on to pinch hit for Cesar Izturis with two men on in the seventh and the home team trailing by three runs. Fox drove a pitch from Taylor Tankersley deep into right-center, but Marlins center fielder Cody Ross made the catch at the wall.

The Orioles were a few feet from tying a game that got hopelessly away from them when the Marlins scored one run in the eighth on Moore's throwing error and three more runs in the ninth off Albers and Frank Mata.

"After [Wieters] hit the home run, I thought we could stay in the game," third baseman Miguel Tejada said. "They get a chance, they get a couple guys on base and score a lot of runs."

Jeff Zrebiec

Monday, May 24, 2010

Ronnie James Dio Dead At 67

Dio has been making music for a long time. The Rock and Roll Geek Show played some of his first records - from 1957. I was one year old then.



Saturday, February 27, 2010

Art Auction at Patapsco High School

Natalie and I went to an art auction at Matthew's high school last night. It worked like a lottery or raffle. You buy a ticket, look through the art, and pick out a group of things you like. Then they put all the tickets in a hat and picked names at random. I got my first pick. It's kind of hard to describe but part of it is a photo of the general who defeated the British at North Point. Natalie picked an oil painting of tulips. There was also a silent auction and we put the only bids in on two oil paintings by a senior at the school. It was fun.







Wednesday, February 17, 2010

It's A Major Award! (Part.1)

On Friday, Tom went to the Migration Skate Shop in Belair and entered a "S.K.A.T.E." contest. He broke his board in the final round but the shop lent him a board so he could finish. He skated the last round against a friend of his and Tom won. The prize for 1st place was a new skate deck.

Tom and his prize.

It's A Major Award! (Part.2)

Matthew and Natalie went to White Marsh mall last Saturday and this skateboard shop called Zumies was having an art contest. You had to paint the front of a hat and include the name of the store in it. They grabbed a blank hat and came home. Matthew painted a snow scene on it and they took it back to the store. A couple of hours later the store called and told him he won 1st prize - a $100 gift certificate.

Matthew accepting his award.


The Hat

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Of All Things, Maggot Brain.

I taped "House" for Natalie Monday and when it was almost over and the patient was dying, "Maggot Brain" started playing on the soundtrack. I couldn't believe it - Maggot Brain! Some great guitar playing there by Eddie Hazel.

Click on the album cover for Wikipedia's entry about the title song. Some creepy stuff there.

Monday, January 11, 2010

YouTube Downloader

I'm going to try this freeware out. It seems pretty straight forward. I used KeepVid a couple of times but it didn't work last time I tried it.


Downloaded and installed YouTube Downloader and it works as advertised. I used it to download videos and convert them for an ipod. There's an option for setting the quality used for the conversion. I used "Optimal" for my stuff. Below is a table listing the settings with the resulting file size.
  • Original - 18 Meg
  • High - 29 Meg
  • Optimal - 11 Meg
  • Medium - 6 Meg

Thursday, July 30, 2009

New Family Member


Javier Oscar Torres

Stacey and Oscar's baby - born July 19th, 11:52 AM. He weighed 6lbs, 13oz and was 21 inches long. Stacey was in labor for 34 hours.

Friday, July 24, 2009

Artscape 2009

Natalie and I went to Artscape on Saturday and Sunday this year.

Saturday we got there around 12 and saw the band "Fall Back Plan" on the Main Stage. They're a talented band but a little generic for my taste. The lead singer was really good. She reminded me of somebody, Gwen Stefani maybe. The parade of Art Cars came by around 12:30, always a high point. We wondered up Mount Royal Avenue, checking out some of the artists booths along the way.

There was an exhibition of Sondheim prize semi-finalists at MICA. That was really interesting. Natalie liked the art that was made up of all these little pictures from the newspaper transferred to the canvas with clear tape and masking tape. There were marble statues of Mario, Kermit the frog and the lego man, and this installation type thing that was kind of creepy. There was a bed or futon in it and all these strands of plastic bags blowing around while a spotlight at the top slowly changed colors.

From there, we headed up past the Art Cars to the Midway on Charles Street. It was packed by then, single file, shoulder to shoulder. Natalie got a little freaked out by the crowd. We did make it up to the Charles Theater area and picked up some stuff from the Free Store in the parking garage. That's when the kids called and told us they had managed to lock themselves out of the house. So that was that.

Sunday we got down there around the same time - noon. That's the best time to be there. We heard an organ concert at Corpus Christi Church that was great. We also tried to go to the Lyric but that was a fiasco. We went right in but instead of Irish dancers there were African dancers on stage. So we left and that was our mistake. When we tried to go back, the place was full. Nobody was leaving and they weren't letting anybody in. After waiting about 20 minutes, I saw the Irish dancers on a monitor in the lobby. So that was a waste. They are going to have to open up the balcony next year.

We wondered around a little longer then went to the Owl bar for a couple of beers. We would have liked to have gone to Brewer's Art but they don't open till 5:00 on Sunday.


Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Souvenir Bat Night

WASHINGTON—Attendance may be down, but the fans at last week's game didn't care—they were too busy enjoying the stadium's new Fuck-Cam.

"We've been really surprised and delighted by the crowd reaction," said Washington Nationals public relations director Janine Perry, who started the Fuck-Cam program that has since been emulated by every other ballpark in the major leagues, except Miller Park in Milwaukee. "Apparently, people who like watching baseball games also really enjoy watching other people have sex. And not just between innings, either. If the action on the screen is still going when the play on the field resumes, they'll still watch. The Fuck-Cam has been quite a phenomenon."

Major League Baseball estimates that more than 700 people have had been featured on the Fuck-Cam since its introduction. The first Fuck-Cam couple, Gary Kochalk and Kim Dahle, have been guests on Late Night With Jimmy Fallon. And a montage of legendary Fuck-Cam performances is one of the most viewed clips on YouTube, featuring such great Fuck-Cam moments as the man who hasn't realized his partner has fallen asleep; a would-be suitor who goes down on one knee, produces a ring, and is flatly denied; an overweight couple who is booed off the JumboTron by the crowd; and a good-natured if somewhat clumsy performance by the Fox Sports broadcast team of Joe Buck and Tim McCarver.

"It's at the point where some people come to the ballpark with the idea of getting themselves on the Fuck-Cam," Perry said. "They dress up for it, wave signs, even start fucking with two outs at the bottom of an inning in the hope they'll get noticed, the whole thing. The buzz has been awesome. Of course, we'd rather people come to see our beloved Nats, but our attitude is, if people having sex in the seats gets people to come to the park, it's good for baseball."

Perry refuses to take credit for the concept, although she did make it official by adding the subtitles and frames now associated with JumboTron displays of crowd sex. Instead, she credits the Washington fans themselves—"the greatest and most sexual fans in the world," she said gratefully—with the spontaneous invention of the Fuck-Cam.

"The Nats were getting blown out by the Dodgers in an early May game, and the camera guy went to the kiss-cam early and often," Perry said. "Well, he lingered a while on the same couple, and they just got into the spirit of the thing and started fucking like you wouldn't believe. It was great, but I really didn't think much about it until the next morning when someone told me it had been mentioned in the news, and later that day it was No. 3 on SportsCenter's Top 10 Plays."

By June, Fuck-Cams were in use at Baltimore's Camden Yards, Detroit's Comerica Park, Yankee Stadium, and countless other major- and minor-league ballparks. The promotion has been a hit at every stadium in which it has been introduced, although the process has not always been smooth.

"You want to be careful," said Wrigley Field cameraman Greg Somerset, who noted that he "gets" an average of four couples a night on his Fuck-Cam. "Sometimes you can have good luck with a guy and a girl who are just sitting next to each other, but other times it doesn't work at all. A couple who's fighting may or may not have great makeup sex while you're watching. Getting two guys on the Fuck-Cam, well, it may work or it may not, and the crowd may or may not like it. The time with two guys and a girl, that was a mixed reaction."

"Also, I just want to forget about souvenir bat night," Somerset added. "You just can't tell with some people."



"The Ayatollah of Rock and Rolla"

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Earl Weaver Tirade

Mike sent me this link an audio clip of Earl Weaver going nuts on "The Manager's Corner" radio show. I can't tell if Weaver's serious or not but it's funny.

Click on Earl's picture to go to the website and hear the audio.


Tuesday, June 09, 2009

First Orioles Game of 2009


My Mother, Mike, Tommy, Matthew, Jocelyn and I went to our first Orioles game of the year tonight and - surprise, surprise - we won, beating the Seattle Mariners 3 to 1 and breaking a five game loosing streak. The Orioles pitcher, Bergesen, went eight scoreless innings and Nolan Reimold had two rbi's, including a homer. It was a fun game - Matt Wieters popped up to the right of the pitchers mound and with four players watching it, it dropped in for a hit. Unfortunately, he tried to stretch it out into a double and was thrown out at second. It was Melvin Mora tee-shirt night and he hit a ball in the first inning that almost went out of the park. In fact, it was initially scored a homer but after instant replay, it was changed to an out. That's the first time I've ever seen instant replay used in a game and it took forever. There was a picture on the front page of the Sun's sports section the next day and it was obviously fan interference. Some drunken moron, wearing a Melvin Mora tee-shirt, stuck his hat right into the Seattle outfielder's glove. Nitwit.

Me and the little darlings

Bergesen delivers.
It poured right before the game and the sky was extremely nasty looking.


Sunday, May 24, 2009

First Trip To The Bengies in 2009 - Memorial Day Dusk To Dawn Show

Matthew and I went to the Bengies for the first time this year for the annual Memorial day all-night show. We both made it through until the sun came up and D. played the national anthem to end the show. We evening stayed awake through "Obsessed".

The Line-Up:

Coraline - Really good and the best movie of the night. In the vein of "Nightmare Before Christmas" and "The Corpse Bride" but better. And weirder. 4 Timmyheads.
Photobucket

Star Trek - Not your father's Star Trek my ass. A steaming pile of lameness. The only cutting edge thing about it was Eric Bana as the Bad Ass and his summary execution (not shown) of the captain of the Kelvin. Matthew liked it though.
Photobucket

Obsessed - Another winner from Beyonce (remember "Goldmember"). Only lots, and lots of T&A could have saved this one.
Photobucket

Knowing - Pretty good but kind of weak towards the end. Reading up about this one is what convinced me to go to the all-night show. Real Sci-Fi, not "Gossip Girl" in space.
Photobucket



Friday, May 22, 2009

Tradition! Dusk 'til Dawn ALL NITE Show


Original email message from the Bengies Drive-In

Dear GREAT Patrons of the Bengies Drive-In Theatre,
We are NOW OPEN on FRIDAY, SATURDAY & SUNDAY!  
DUSK   'til   DAWN    
THIS weekend is Memorial Day weekend, and our 53rd* ANNUAL all night shows in the drive-in tradition! 
We WILL be open all 3 nights BUT the Dusk to Dawn shows will ONLY play on Saturday and Sunday.

(
53rd*Ken noted, this is actually the 53rd, BECAUSE the Bengies did not open until JUNE of 1956, so there was no Memorial day show. The Labor Day weekend D to D will be the 54th in this 53rd Anniversary Year of the Bengies.) 

3 of the 4 titles ARE in W I D E  S C R E E N, showing  EDGE TO EDGE on the biggest theatre screen in the *USA!*  Saturday and Sunday is the traditional...
DUSK   'til   DAWN  

"STAR TREK" rated PG13, is HOLDING, because it is way too much fun, but mostly because we have seen an increase in interest both from fans who wish to see it again, BUT AMAZINGLY, from the folks who were never Star Trek Fans It is important to note here, that you do not have to be a fan or even ever had an interest in "Star Trek" to enjoy this fine feature.

Showing all 3 nights with the VERY fast paced "STAR TREK" is the top rated thriller, "OBSESSED" rated PG13. An unhinged stalker  threatens to destroy a happy family and career.

We will begin the ALL NIGHT program (Saturday into Sunday, and Sunday into Memorial Day Monday) with the HIGHLY ACCLAIMED, one-of-a-kind animated feature "CORALINE" rated PG.

The program will also include a sci-fi thriller, "KNOWING" rated PG13.  Roger Ebert of the Chicago Sun Times, says: "...among the best science-fiction films I've seen..."

CONNECT with us:
Twitter    Facebook   Myspace    RSS web browsers: Internet Explorer, Firefox, Safari

For feature synopsis and more visit:
Or just click on the BENGIES banner below 

3417 Eastern Blvd. Baltimore, MD 21220 Since 1956
Feature & Show Time Information: *NEW* 410 391-1956 OR the Good 'ol Original: 410 687-5627
Box Office OPENS THIS Fri. At 7pm,
Sat. & Sun. At 6:45pm.
The Show CURRENTLY Starts ALL 3 NIGHTS At Sunset,
Now Occurring At 8:30pm

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Slugger

From Mike Kelly

I just heard from Jocelyn's coach at Harford Community College that she was nominated for the All Conference and All region XX teams. Both teams will be announced after the region XX tournament.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Karen's 50th Birthday Party

Jean and Colleen had a surprise 50th Birthday party for Karen today. The party was at her boyfriend's Steve's house, way out York Road. We had a good time and there was a ton of food. The weather was great too, I spent most of the day outside. Jean and Judy and their gangs all came to town for the party (except Melissa - she had to work).





Link to these photos on Flickr 
(These are small, relatively poor quality copies of the original photos. If you want better quality versions, let me know)

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Michael Bay Signs $50M Deal To Fuck Up 'ThunderCats'

LOS ANGELES—In the largest deal ever made to shit out a movie, Warner Bros. and director Michael Bay announced a landmark $50 million agreement this week to monumentally fuck up ThunderCats.

"I couldn't be more excited to completely fuck this up," said Bay, who plans to begin production on destroying the live-action adaptation next month. "ThunderCats has a great story, endearing characters, action, adventure, space-travel, and fantasy. It will be an honor to run it into the ground."

"I'll use every directorial tool I have to suck the very life and charm out of this beloved cartoon," added Bay, claiming that the film could turn out to be the most colossal piece of shit he's ever worked on. "I won't rest until I get every last scene exactly wrong."

According to executives, Warner Bros. settled on Bay after a 12-month search of Hollywood's most reviled directors, including Joel Schumacher, Roland Emmerich, and Brett Ratner. In the end, the studio decided only Bay could be relied upon to deliver a 220-minute cinematic clusterfuck with enough tedious performances, overblown cinematography, and CGI explosions to make even the most casual fan want to scratch their eyes out.

"No filmmaker working today has Bay's ability to somehow direct his actors to be both emotionless and melodramatic at once," Warner Bros. CEO Barry Meyer said. "And I personally can't wait to see how he needlessly overcomplicates the plot."

Bay reportedly only agreed to fuck up ThunderCats after several specific conditions were written into his contract. According to the terms of the deal, Bay must be allowed to eliminate the character Panthro entirely to focus on the asinine relationship between Snarf and Snarfer, and include nearly 22 minutes of frenetic, impossible-to-follow action sequences that he hopes will annoy the living Christ out of audiences.

"We're just getting started on the storyboards, but I've already got a lot of really contrived ideas about zooming in way too close and shooting everything at nauseating angles," said Bay, who claimed viewers won't be able to tell if the climactic final battle is between two blurry elbows or a half dozen leopard-print pillows. "I promise you'll walk out of the theater feeling like you just flushed $12 down the toilet."

"You will all fucking hate me," he continued.

Hollywood insiders agreed that Bay—who has reportedly been closely involved in each of the 45 progressively worse rewrites of the script—was a natural choice to take a steaming dump on the popular ThunderCats property.

"Michael Bay has this innate sense of how to ruin a great story," Variety reporter Todd Brick said. "His ability to create astonishing plot holes, pepper dialogue with groan-inducing clichés, and abandon storylines halfway through is unparalleled. He was born to destroy this movie."

Though he admitted there was still "a lot of fucking up to do" before the script attains his trademark shit-slicked sheen, Bay has recruited hack writers Alex Kurtzman and Roberto Orci to punch-up the screenplay with hollow characters and by-the-numbers jokes about kitty litter boxes and hair balls.

But all the time and effort, Bay claimed, is worth it to ensure that he fucks ThunderCats up as badly as he knows he can.

"Ever since I failed to ruin Scarlett Johansson's career with The Island, I've been looking for a challenge like this," Bay said. "Who knows? With Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen and ThunderCats coming out in the same year, I may finally reach my goal of making all of America hate cinema forever." 

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Things Just Taste Better Out Of A Skull by Munkarth the Lesser


I'm a man who knows what he likes. I like the hot spray of fresh blood against my face, I like the cold clasp of wrought-iron chain mail around my thighs, and, of course, I like the taste of almost anything consumed from the skull of a beheaded enemy. For me, nothing beats a crisp beverage or hearty entrée served in the bony remains of a human head. Whether I'm swilling down breakfast mush or nibbling on a light dinner salad, a skull turns any dining experience into a special event.

I don't know what it is, but food served in a hollowed-out brain pan is always delicious. My wife says it's a psychological thing, and there's definitely some truth to that. Eating from a skull stirs up memories of standing victorious upon a smoldering battlefield, the piercing shriek of a slain foe's death cry still ringing in one's ears and that little bit of magic can really make fresh-picked strawberries lightly brushed with a balsamic vinegar reduction jump to life.

I'll never forget the first time I ate from the still-warm skull of an enemy. Barely 19 and returning home from a decisive victory over a sworn nemesis, I chose to celebrate with a feast of truffled lobster risotto in a shiitake mushroom garnish. My uncle Duvan the Middle suggested that, instead of eating it from a pasta bowl, I fashion a crude serving receptacle from the skull of a warrior chieftain I had slaughtered that day. A couple of bites and I was hooked. What a gastronomic revelation!

No matter what my wife says, though, I've eaten from enough skulls to know my gustatory reaction is about more than cherished reminiscences of horrifying carnage. Stews and pot roasts in particular have a way of seeping into the nooks and crannies of the bones, infusing every bite with flavor. And the lingering hint of dense connective tissue and cerebrospinal fluid can spice up any dish. Once you've tried skulls, I guarantee you won't return to traditional dinnerware.

Most folks have a little trepidation their first time, but that's only natural if you stop to consider that the object you're eating from used to contain a mind bent on hacking you to pieces with a broadsword. You're bound to think, 'If my blade had been a fraction of a second slower, if my shield had failed to repel just one blow, then someone would be eating food out of my skull right now.' And, I suppose, my archrival Gundemar the Visigoth could one day be guzzling from my head that dish his wife so generously calls baked ziti. But no skull in the world is going to make that edible.

If I've piqued your interest, allow me to offer a few cranial-culinary tips: First, it's very important that each skull come from a vanquished mortal adversary. Simply killing that neighbor with the yapping dog isn't going to cut it. Second, when you step into the kitchen, keep in mind that your only limits are the number of heads you've lopped off and your own creativity.

I like to throw dinner parties for my friends, each with a different theme. For example, after a successful ambush of invading Gauls, we might prepare a sumptuous bouillabaisse that we've let simmer for hours in our enemies' severed heads. And another time we might have Taco Night.

Believe me, the 22 bones of the skull aren't the only ones rife with gourmet possibilities. Back in college, we used to make beer bongs with spines we ripped from the chests of our rivals. More recently, my family has begun starting each day with a fruit smoothie spooned from a hollowed-out femur—a healthy treat that is an absolute delight after you've sucked down a few mouthfuls of marrow.

Before you start trying out your own recipes, though, I must issue a stern warning: Remember to observe the difference between the freshly decapitated skull of a long-despised opponent and that of a person you hate out of mere narrow-minded prejudice. To sup from the first is to be a warrior born, one beholden to sacred traditions and values. To sup from the latter is plain bigotry. Do not dishonor the customs of our people, or one day you might find your own skull being used to serve hummus to my in-laws! I will use your eye sockets to hold the chips! I will use the gaps between your teeth to hold the crudités! By Odin, I will lick your skull clean when we're though snacking!

Please excuse my outburst.

So, if you're skilled with a blade, part of a family that nurses centuries-old blood feuds, or simply looking for an excuse to indulge your taste buds, eating and drinking from a human skull might be just the thing for you. You'll never go back to eating out of sheep bladders.

From the Onion

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Watchmen At The Senator

Photobucket

Went to see "Watchmen" at the Senator tonight. It was great. I was kind of not looking forward to going because of how long it was - almost three hours, but I really didn't notice. Matt & Tom and John & Jeremy went and they all liked it too. If I had known about the Senator's future, I would have spent some time looking around the place. As it is, this was probably the last movie I'll see there during it's time as a working, commercial movie theater.

Link to Patty Boh's Watchmen Photostream

Monday, March 09, 2009

Brenda Wilson (Nock) 1949 - 2009

Natalie's sister Brenda died at home on March 1st, 2009. Carol and Natalie had driven to Indiana that same day and were with her when she died. Her husband Farris and daughter Ann were with her also. The annual Nock Sisters visit will never be the same. She will be missed.

Click the pictures below to download or view the originals.


Natalie, Brenda and Anne at Carol's House, Fall 2008